~My Unstable Feeling~

I really can't deal with my feeling anymore...

feeling so unstable now...

I feel like this and at the next second it's just swing like that...

It's not only affect me,I know that...

It's affect people surround me...

But what can I do...

I can't really control how I feel now and later...

Knowing that I have this problem even making me stress thinking how am I going to stop all this...

I know that I not at the state where I am going to hurt myself...

But I am too afraid that I will reach that step without knowing that I am getting worst...

I want to tell someone...

But I don't who the person is...

It's not like I want to get that attention...

It's really hard to tell someone that don't understand my state...

For some of you out there think that what in my mind is nothing...

But it's really bothering me right now...

I want to stop those voices in my mind...

But the stronger the will,the louder the voices get into me...

Lot of people out there seeing that I am smiling...

But really,it's tiring to provide that smile...

I feel like I am a doll...

That is being control...by no one...

I can't control myself...

Just sometime can force myself to smile...

Hearing someone say you have a beautiful smile really make me happy...

But it's also making my heart to bleed at the same time...

This is all for today...

Writing really make me feel a bit better...

So please don't say that I do this for getting anyone attention...

Just to heal myself...

~Helping~

I feel really sad...

A friend told this to me today...

"Why you don't even try to help us?or you don't us to be happy?"

I feel like crying when I heard...

Only God know how hard I am trying to help them...

The thing they ask me to help is not an easy task...

Although I seem like a happy girl with a lot of friends,

but the fact is I only have "surface" friend...

I never have a friend that I really can talk 'heart to heart'...

I help them....but my friend can't help...

What can I do???

I feel really upset...I feel like hard stones are keep falling on me...

I am smiling...

but my heart...It's hurt...

I never though that he will say that...

Why no one want to understand me...

I am having enough burden with my study...

Being with you guys,hoping that I can be happy...

Huhuhuhu....

~Sakitnya Hati Ini~

Kenapa lah orang kat dunia ni tak tau nak bersyukur...

Lelaki pun sama gak...

Dah betul2 kita setia kat dia,boleh plak dia main2...

Pasang 2 -3 orang...Mungkin lebih lagi kot...

Kita nak keluar dengan kawan berjantinakan lelaki punya lah susah...

Dia boleh2 plak tidur sana-sini...

Macam tu rupanya...

Eh...Aku tak heran tau...

Kau boleh buat,aku pun boleh...

Cuma otak kita masih waras nak wat cam tu...

N satu lagi kita nak bagitau...What U Give U Get Back...

Time tu Good Luck lah ya...^^

Because kita dah takder ngan U lagi...^^

Bab kita dah bagi banyak sangat peluang...

~What is Love~

Susah na mok padah pasal cinta tok....

Mun mok padah cinta tok molah kita rasa best, salah juak nak...

Mun mok padah cinta tok molah kita rasa sakit, pun salah juak...

Giney lah???

Kamek pun sik tauk pa gik mok dipadah...

Bergerek then putus lekak ya bergerek gik...putus gik...Susah na....

Suma beggining jak best...tengah nya jadi hambar then ujung2 putus....

Dak ya kisah cinta manusia...cney kamek mok mencarik manusia yang nang mena2 setia ko...

Susah mun kita jak setia....

Sakit hati sorang2....

Susah mok padah...

Then last2 nya padah kita yang salah...

Huhuhuhuhu.....

~This is Life~

Someone, somebody please look into my eyes,

Understand the pain I feel inside.

I don't want those tears come from my eyes,

Neither the pain that stuck in my life.

Why not we stop telling lies,

Cause lies always make us cries.

We face each other with laugh and smile,

And make Jesus the guardian of life.

He provide us the road and the light,

Will never leave us in the night.

Whenever you feel like in the dark,

Pray to Him, He will come and stay by your side.

~Hari ini~

What have i done last nite?
i dont know...
i dont even want to know is it right or wrong...
i just want to spend my day with laugh and smile...
i like it when people say "u such a happy person"...
its worth it...
although its hurt inside...
no one know how i crying inside...
i didnt ask for any help...
just i need people to understand me...
that enough...

~How I feel~

Sakitnya hati saya...
saya pun dah tak nak buat apa lagi...
kat dunia ni agaknya dah takda manusia yang ikhlas dan jujur kot...
ada yang bahagia bila tengok kita sengsara...
aduh....
macam mana lah nak hidup dalam dunia yang macam ni...
i am fed up...
i am tired walking on this path of life...
someone please tell me,
whether i am the one that have mental illness
or the world is running on that weird way...
she tell me like this..
then he the other way...
he blame me...
she said she tell the truth...
go to he** with the truth...
f*** the truth...
everyone is f***ing liar...
i am the one that always tell the truth...
yet everyone say i am the one who lying....
what happen to the world...
what honest mean?
where is the price of honesty and sincerity??????
i am the one that wrong????
is it?